Un-Forgiving

I have been reflecting and contemplating on the energy of forgiveness. In the Grief Recovery work that I practice for myself and with clients, forgiving is one part of the journey in healing grief. This is a section that (with sincere honesty) most find least easy. Now in Grief Recovery, there is no “pressure” to forgive anyone, but a suggestion to at least use the word with even a statement like – “I am not ready to honestly forgive X(person) for Y(experience/event). Often this leaves a window open for possible forgiveness to take place one day and/or to fully accept the Truth of the present moment. This is what I decided to focus my reflective time on without the details of specific incidents or right/wrong actions that have led to a need for healing, but focused on the energy of forgiving itself. Of course my deep reflection time also includes time for quiet meditation and it seems I received the message that this heart and mind were ready to hear. Not so surprising, but I learned about how incredibly powerful the act of honestly and fully forgiving is. I say “not so surprising” because I have seen in others and felt in myself the incredible relief to oneself that the act of compassionately forgiving another is. It truly is a gift to the Self – and yes, I mean the Divine Self. This Self is Pure Consciousness itself and we all carry this with us.

“Forgiveness is not a feeling; it is a commitment. It is a choice to show mercy, not to hold the offense up against the offender. Forgiveness is an expression of love.”

– Gary Chapman

We can simply think about why we do not forgive easily. Because we are hurt. Because we do not want to be hurt again. Because it feels like “a card up our sleeve” to be able to remind someone sometimes indirectly and sometimes even directly about that hurt… or just hold onto the memory for that one day we can use it this way. Yet that energy is hurting ourselves and the energy of the world around us too. I read a perfect quote for this idea:

Slide the weight from your shoulders and move forward. You are afraid you might forget, but you never will. You will forgive and remember.”

– Barbara Kingsolver

So the big surprise to me during my meditative time is that I saw many events from my own personal life through a “vision” or “mystical experience” while in a deep meditation that showed me my own life (this life) and the energy of non-forgiving times vs. forgiving/loving times. Yes, the honest and humble act of forgiving truly has the energy of Love. I saw even how energies on “the other side” have sent energies of love when they were seeking forgiveness (even from their own selfish acts – even through their human lives) and I saw the power of the energy of forgiving was helping others as well as myself – and in fact, being the supportive energy that has helped me in times I had no idea it was doing so. I saw how non-forgiving even while “getting over” or “tolerating” not-great actions/words from another was the same vibrational frequency as the other’s guilt, shame, and own suffering. Not something that I would like to contribute to today.

This was a profound Awareness for me. But my contemplative time then looked to the various (“unforgiving” and damaging) weather events around our Earth… floods, fires, tornadoes. In fact, we had a severe weather advisory for the past couple of days in my town and I know that Ottawa (another city in Ontario – the province I live in) was hit with both tornadoes and heavy rain very recently. Of course I have heard about the fires in Maui too. Lots of the Earth is “suffering.” So I reflected on how I could possibly energetically help this. I sent out the same prayer/wish for the Earth as I send to mankind daily… of Peace for healing wounds. Well yesterday, within the 5-10 minutes I came home and ran to the bathroom after smiling that there was no heavy rain/storm as had been predicted all day when I had gone to the Latin Festival just down the street from my home – something happened. While in the bathroom, I heard what sounded like very heavy rain and wind gusts. So I stepped out again to see if it had started raining. It was not raining. But when I looked at the driveway I had just walked on, to get to my door, I say many branches on the ground that had none on it before I went to the bathroom. I also noticed the ground was quite wet! It was completely dry before my bathroom trip.

I had to thank the Universe right away through a brief meditation as I wondered if my wish for Peace had helped our town avoid more damage as was quite possible from the predictions. I received the message that I was ONE of the many energies that helped. Wow. How incredibly powerful and humbling at the same time.

I learned through this contemplative time that EVERY BIT MATTERS. Our thoughts create our reality indeed. If we are unforgiving, we are also seeing nature showing unforgiving and raging patterns. Being forgiving does not mean that we accept poor behaviour/actions/words from people – that benefits from moving away from regular contact with such energies. But accepting such actions through our forgiving minds as another’s journey allows a Divine energy to help with the healing of all. This I KNOW. I have seen this and accept it fully. As for weather patterns… let’s learn (remember) how to communicate with the weather as we would with a pet or person that is aggressive because of abuse/neglect… with Love and gentle communication with a touch of the forgiving energy of Acceptance. There is a huge power to this energy of Forgiving.

Remember also that many of us (all of us?) may come to realize areas in our own lives that we do not bless ourselves with the power of full forgiveness too. Do not forget that we each deserve this energy from ourselves. In fact, we need this most from ourselves because only from this place can we be certain of our own authentic heartfelt understanding and compassion for ourselves which accompanies Love in this experience of Forgiving. Remember – Every Bit Matters.

May we become more Forgiving and welcome all energies to join us in this space for a happier and healthier planet.

The first to apologize is the bravest. The first to forgive is the strongest. And the first to forget is the happiest.”

– Unknown

Much Love to All Readers – thanks for reading!

Kindly,

Hanifa